She Said, “No Religion, Please”: Why Secular Chaplain Care Matters

👉 If you’d rather watch the video version, you can find it here.

Having access to secular chaplain care is deeply important for so many people. I’ll never forget one story from my years as a hospice chaplain that really captures why.

When I went to visit a new patient for the first time and introduced myself as the chaplain, she immediately said, “Thank you—but I don’t want religion to be part of my care. I’ve been hurt by a religious organization, and I want nothing to do with it.”

I completely understood. Once I explained that my role was to meet her where she was—not to bring any religious framework or belief system—she was glad to hear it. I told her that I was there to offer emotional and spiritual care for the human spirit, in whatever way would feel meaningful to her.

From then on, she welcomed me into her space. Over the last months of her life, we had some of the most genuine, heartfelt conversations I’ve ever had in my work. Near the end, she told me how grateful she was to have found secular chaplain care. She said it felt like a relief to finally have a safe, compassionate space where she could share her questions and pain without worrying about getting a religious answer in return.

She joked and said, “I wish I’d known about secular chaplains sooner—I could have used someone like this earlier in my life.”

That conversation has always stayed with me. It’s why I believe so strongly that people deserve access to care that isn’t tied to religion. We all need a place where we can talk honestly about what matters to us, what gives our lives meaning, and what we’re struggling with—without having someone else’s beliefs imposed on us.

If you’re someone who needs emotional or spiritual support that doesn’t involve religion, please know that secular chaplains are here. You don’t have to walk through hard things alone.

💛 Ashley

 Your secular chaplain

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