Why I Left My Faith: A Story of Disappointment and Hope

Ashley Beaty-Perry
Sep 2, 2025
3 min read

Updated: Sep 27, 2025

woman speaking Ashley Perry from Connection From Here

There was such disappointment. My leaving religion story doesn’t come with trauma, but it does carry a tremendous weight of grief and disillusionment.

I wanted to share my story because when we tell our stories — and listen to the stories of others — we feel less alone. And if you’ve left your faith community, I want you to know that your story matters too.

👉 You can also watch the full video version here: Why I Left My Faith: A Story of Disappointment and Hope.

Growing Up in Faith

I grew up in the Christian faith, and it was a fairly progressive tradition. By the time I reached adulthood, I no longer believed in a supernatural being. But even without that belief, I stayed.

Why? Because I deeply believed in the community. For me, faith was about standing with the poor, working for equality, caring for the oppressed. Those values mattered to me, and I thought they were the foundations of the faith I was part of.

That sense of shared purpose kept me connected, even when my theology had shifted.

The Turning Point: Values vs. Votes

The break came when I saw people in my community live out one thing on Sunday and something very different during the week.

They would sing hymns about love and justice, but then vote for policies and leaders that, to me, represented the opposite of love, care, and equality.

That was the moment I realized: this community no longer reflected the values I thought we shared. And if I couldn’t trust the community to hold those values, then it was no longer the place for me.

The Disappointment and the Grief

Leaving wasn’t about losing a belief in God — I’d stepped away from that long before. What really hurt was losing the community.

I had believed that community was built on justice, kindness, and care for all. But when that foundation cracked, so did my belonging.

The grief was real. These were people I admired, people who had been an important part of my life. And suddenly, I couldn’t see myself reflected there anymore.

Naming that grief — calling it what it was — helped me see that it wasn’t weakness, it was honesty. I wasn’t alone in feeling disappointed. Others have felt it too.

Finding Hope Again

What has helped me most is talking with others who’ve left religion. Sharing our experiences doesn’t fix the grief, but it helps us carry it. We remind each other that we’re not crazy, not broken, and not alone.

There’s hope in that. Hope in knowing we can build new communities. Hope in finding people who share our values. Hope in moving forward, even when what we left behind feels heavy.

You’re Not Alone

If you’ve felt this kind of disappointment — if you’ve stepped away and realized the community you counted on wasn’t what you thought — I want you to know: your grief is real, your disappointment is valid, and you’re not alone in it.

I’d love to hear your story, too. What has your experience been like after leaving your faith community? Share in the comments or connect with me directly.

We may not have the same path, but walking alongside each other makes the journey lighter.